Harold (Harry) Phratry and the jinx

When you are young, you do stupid things. When you do stupid things, you fall through a skylight into a dinner party. Or so they would have you believe. Harry did stupid things several times a year. Harry is not young.

When you are older, you do stupid things. When you do stupid things, it hurts. That's the difference. It hurts a lot.

Younger Harry, on a fishing trip with Elmer Phud, hooked his finger with a number two treble hook. It was just after he had consumed several adult drinks. The finger was hooked good. Blood and everything. Harry grabbed another large drink, downed it in one or two sips. He grabbed the hook and gave it a yank. Out came the hook as well as a good sized chunk of Harry’s finger. Younger Harry felt no pain. Harry grabbed both oars and rowed the boat ashore. Several day's later, older Harry was in a great deal of pain. Harry's hand, swollen up to about twice the original size, hurt very badly and was useless to row the boat for several weeks. Elmer had to use the outboard motor during that time. Proves the older you are, the more it hurts.

Harry, while on a hunting trip for big horn sheep in the mountains, flew off a cliff. Well, not so much as flew. More of 'walked' off. Harry had filled his canteen with a very strong adult drink. While walking along a trail which followed the side of a cliff, He unhooked his canteen for the umpteen time, took a big swallow with out stopping. He then proceeded to walk off into space. Much like the cartoon coyote, Willie. With much the same results. He did not fall as far. It only seemed like it. But unlike Willie, Harry broke a leg. Harry laid there, consumed more of the drink. Then, being a decorated army veteran, he remember the rule of firing three shots in the air to attract others. Harry fired three times in the air, sat back to wait for Elmer Phud, his hunting partner.

It was going on dark by the time Elmer stumbled across Harry at the bottom of the 12 foot cliff. Asked why he did not fire three shots, Harry replied he did, more than once. He allowed the next time they go hunting he was going to use a rifle and leave the bow hunting up to others. No matter, Harry was feeling no pain.

Three day's later, an older Harry was released from the hospital. Older Harry was in a lot of pain. Older Harry and drugs were old friends. The older you are, the more it hurts. Usually in places you had forgotten you had. Harry allowed as how he was not going on trips with Elmer for a while. After hooking his finger and now with a broken leg, he was convinced Elmer was a jinx.

Works for me.

Big Daddy Phunk & Social Security

The following is the experience and opinion of Big Daddy Phunk (Melvin Phunkle) as told to this writer. The writer cleaned up the language as a matter of general interest.

When you work, you pay taxes. When you pay taxes, your employer pays taxes. When your employer pays taxes, it is deducted from your paycheck. When it is deducted from your paycheck, you pay for social security. When you pay social security, you get money back after retiring. When you learn, you earn. Works for me.

When you collect social security it is an entitlement, So Hell yes, we collect it! When workers spend their entire working careers at a job, or jobs, perchance they did not like, to provide food, clothing, shelter and transportation for family members, they deserve this entitlement. We worked and paid into this fund. I am here to tell you it is a good thing. I worked for 40+ years for a few good employers but mostly for bad ones.

It is a good thing to find and work for good employer's. The good employers hire a person with the expertise and education, gave the support needed to do the job. Many times this support result’s in more education via seminars, on the job training and other classes. You are in a good company when they stress further education to do your job or get a promotion. A good company does not over-hire, gives fair raises and never take or give a bonus when business is not so good. The good companies flourish and grow during good and bad times. These companies last a long time. There are very few good companies.

It is a bad thing to join a bad company. Bad companies ignore the eduction and experience. When you join a bad company, no further education is forthcoming. Many go out of the way to see you do not have the tools you need. Bad companies over-hire and lay off personnel at a drop of the hat, knowing full well business is going down hill. A bad company gives out large raises and bonuses to management even during bad times. These companies never offer further advancement, on the job training nor more education. The bad ones never flourish, going out of business by filing bankruptcy. The life span of a bad company is but a few years. There are many bad companies.

During our working years, retired workers paid into the S.S. Fund via taxes deducted from paychecks. This fund is similar to a long term savings account. The money is taken off the top of our wages. The employer matches the funds, again in the form of a tax. This action sets aside funds for us to draw on in our retirement after turning 62 years of age. Think of it as investing in an annuity. We invested and EARNED the right to draw S.S. What better way to save for retirement?

Want to stimulate the economy? Double the monthly payments to those on S.S.. This action could be based on annual income. Example: those that make equal to, or less than fifty K a year from S.S. And other income funds such as unions or private savings. Doubling the payment for most if not all, in this category, would mean many still would not be making fifty K a year. A cap of fifty K payment schedule could be tied to a cost of living increase every two years.

Recipients would spend it on things they need such as food, clothing, medical, housing and transportation. There would be less people on the dole. They would go out shopping, add more insurance, buy auto's and vacation plans. They would invest in the next generation via help with trade-school and college. They would invest in the stock market, savings and other means of investments. They would be investing in LIFE. Granted, this does not directly add jobs but the job market and the economy would improve over time because people on S.S. would be spending. Companies would expand to meet the new demand in all areas of the common market. It would be a simple matter of making the current monthly payment twice a month. No other changes required.

To offset this, double the deductions from the paychecks and from the employer for those making over 150 K a year and increase the wage base to a half million. This action would keep inflation in check. This may not be a perfect plan but it is much better than eliminating S.S., forcing workers to open private savings. Most already have a savings account and as a long term tool, does not work. During bad times it is too easy to tap into these funds, depleting the account. One cannot tap into the tax based accounts.

I know if my entitlement was doubled, I still would not make fifty K a year.

No Brag. Just Fact.