It was a warm, calm, sunlit afternoon. The water was as smooth as glass on Phume Lake. Elmer Phud was on his pontoon, the “Loony ‘Toon”, hoping to hook a large game fish. Phume Lake has its own unique variety of game fish. A mean, smelly flat fish sometimes found in clear, shallow water near Bear Island. Best caught using a few brewski’s. Not as bait but to drink before a line is tossed in the water. Enough brewski’s, country and western music on the radio, and you are almost quarantined to see a few Lutefisk. Every fisherman knows two things. First-the more brewski's you drink, the more fish you see. Second-the more brewski's, the bigger the fish. Ask any sportsman over the age of 21.
Elmer is a dedicated fisherman. Easily distracted while doing chores around the lake place. He has been known to tell his neighbors he is going into town. Then he is seen going out to his pontoon for a day on the lake. Town & whatever it was he needed is long forgotten. Elmer dislikes Lutefisk. Elmer believes it is his duty to personally rid the waters of Phume Lake of this vile creature.
Lutefisk is a close relative to the whitefish & northern cod. Whether preserved, cooked or just left out in the sun to rot, it is a smelly vile thing. The smell, (& presumably, the taste) is enough to gag a vulture. Just getting it off the hook after catching will stretch your senses to the breaking point.
Elmer's best friend and neighbor is Big Daddy Phunk. Don’t mention him by his given name of Melvin Phunkle. He doesn't like the name & will not answer to it. You may remember Big Daddy. He wrote and still performs his single hit song “Who let the fish out” around campfires. He is also the co-inventor of the campfire dance, the “Crappie Flop”. A few brewski’s will get him in the dancing mood. A few more will get him to dance. Save your brew, the dance is not something for responsible adults to see.
Big Daddy claims to be descended from Norwegian Vikings with a little American Indian thrown in. Elmer believes the closes he has ever been to being Indian is just maybe his great grandfather had an American Indian family as a neighbors. Big Daddy loves Lutefisk. During the season, he prepares lutefisk almost every weekend. This is a source of contention between Elmer and Big Daddy. Elmer wants to rid the world of this smelly resource. Big Daddy wants to preserve this wonderful food item for future generations. So they have come to a compromise. Elmer catches said fish, gives to Big Daddy to prepare and eat. They both believe they have won. Elmer, by catching lutefisk, believes he is ridding the world of a foul critter, Big daddy, because he believes Elmer can not and does not catch very many, will never be able to empty the lake of a gourmets delight. They both are satisfied. Thus they live happily as best friends and neighbors.
Elmer was fishing over one of his favorite holes. It had in the past, produced a good stringer of sunfish. His favorite person to take along fishing was his young grandson. However, said grandson was a restless soul. When the fish were biting, grandson required Elmer to bait the hook. This took a lot of effort because the fish could be caught at a furious pace.
Thus, Elmer spent all his time baiting and rigging the fishing pole for grandson until he was tired of catching fish. Then grandson would put the pole down and play under the table with his toys until he fell asleep. When Elmer finally had the time to fish, they stopped biting. So Elmer would sit there, fishing pole in hand and because he was tired from helping grandson, fall asleep. Thus would pass another great day of fishing.
Thus, Elmer spent all his time baiting and rigging the fishing pole for grandson until he was tired of catching fish. Then grandson would put the pole down and play under the table with his toys until he fell asleep. When Elmer finally had the time to fish, they stopped biting. So Elmer would sit there, fishing pole in hand and because he was tired from helping grandson, fall asleep. Thus would pass another great day of fishing.
When fishing with Big Daddy, Elmer was not allowed to fish in the area where the game fish, Lutefisk was known to hang out. So once again they fished over holes known to have pan fish. During these times a few brewski’s were part of the tackle supplies. Elmer, being captain & a responsible person, never got tipsy. Big Daddy was just the opposite. A few brews And he was ripe for singing & dancing. Would not be long, he would attract other boats to our area. The boats would tie up to Elmer's boat. Fishing forgotten. Party time! If Big Daddy did not fall in the lake at least once, it was a dull party.
Today, Elmer was alone on the pontoon. Sipping on a brew. A very nice, sunny day. The gentle wave’s rocked the pontoon. This made him sleepy. He had baited the hook, tossed it out, sat watching the bobber. Slow action. The fish must be napping. So will I thought Elmer as he fell asleep..
Hope you catch a gentle wave.
No comments:
Post a Comment